For the Love (Hate?) of Instagram: Part 1. The Myths

Lessons from 2.5 months off of social media

Hello friends!

I’m excited to share some hot & heavy thoughts that have been swirling around my head & my heart for weeks. 

TLDR: I spent 2.5 months off of social media, and during that time, learned a lot. This is the first of a 3-part series devoted to those lessons.

• Part 1: The Myths - fears I had about quitting the platform vs. the realities & realizations
  
  

• Part 2: The Uncomfortable Truths - things I noticed about myself that feel very embarrassing, but are totally human
  
  

• Part 3: The New Commitments, Mantras, etc. - new life & thought experiments I’m choosing to proactively combat my own amnesia

Writing this was very helpful for me to digest the things that I’ve learned - and I hope that there’s something in here that’s for you, too.

Engaging here has proved to be infinitely more meaningful than the ‘gram - so I’d really love to know what stuck or stung in the comments. 

As always - thank you for reading <3

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PART 1: The Myths (fears I had about quitting the platform)

Myth: I’m going to miss out on so much important spiritual/mental health content! 

Reality: The best way to change – is to change. There is a huuuuuge difference between knowing something in theory, and living it in practice. It’s fun to feel enlightened AF after consuming all of the memes on all of the wellness accounts - but the real test is living it. I realized I had known so many things with my head, but I wasn’t embodying them. Sure, I believe that we should treat people like people, and am happy to repost the meme that preaches it. But if I’m scrolling while waiting for my coffee instead of talking to the person making it - am I not also full of total shit? I’m not missing anything if I observe myself consistently, and make tiny tweaks to how I behave, and how I think. That’s the work. There is nothing I will ever consume on social media that can replace that. 

Myth: Everyone will forget about me and I will become obsolete!!!

Reality: I will never be obsolete to the people in my life who matter the most. There is a massive amount of pressure to constantly be on this platform - post stories, don’t let the algorithm forget you, make sure the people know you are woke & well-informed. But none of that…is real. It is a literal grain of sand in the entire ocean that it is the internet. And? Being Somebody means being somebody in real life. No one will talk about your social media profile at your funeral - they will tell stories about what you did, and the way you made people feel. It’s who you are in the flesh that matters.

Myth: I won’t know what anyone else is doing with their lives - I’ll feel so left out!

Reality: My catch-ups will be enriched by this mystery. Without the knowledge of someone’s day-to-day life, I will be able to meet conversations with genuine curiosity about what people have been up to, and they will tell me the things that are actually important. With the assumptions and baseline knowledge stripped away - I will actually be able to practice the art of conversation, which is a muscle that had severely atrophied. Also? Constantly consuming other peoples’ lives is
e x h a u s t i n g. And a very boring way to spend my one wild & precious life.

Myth: There is some Very Important Knowledge on social media and I will be out of the loop if I’m not on it - I don’t want to seem uninformed!!!!

Reality: 99% of it is either trash, recycled “digestable truths” that have been slightly reworded, and a sprinkling of news. That I can read….via the news. The beautiful thing about that? There’s no echo chamber, no instant-anxiety at having missed some horrific event, no pressure to perform or stay woke. Walking around on the other side of the globe (and back in my little corner of it in Atlanta) I could see the world for what it really was. However small of a sliver, it was beautiful. Hopeful. Full of people and interactions that were genuine and joyful and simple and true. Yes - this world can be hopeless and cruel, but not all of it is. And with the constant doom & gloom that we’re smacked with every time we look at our phones - I think it’s important to look up, and remember.   

Myth: I will be disconnected from the people I love, and the people I don’t talk to that often! Instagram is a way to keep in touch with many people at the same time!

Reality: Texting people I love with pictures or thoughts that remind me of them feels so much more special. As for the people I don’t speak to that often? We will pick up where we left off, if there is real connection there. If our connection requires the fragile fodder of “I saw you went to France last Summer” – it’s not that deep. As my husband so eloquently put it, “This thing is really just a location tracker. Oh, this person is there - nice. And this other person is now here, doing this - cool.” We are not biologically built to know what 1,000 different humans are doing on any given day. Why are we convincing ourselves that it matters?

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Next up —> PART 2: The Uncomfortable Truths (things I noticed about myself that feel very embarrassing, but are totally human)